Do You Really Have to Love Yourself Before You Can Love Someone Else?
Do You Really Have to Love Yourself Before You Can Love Someone Else?
Wednesday, November 1, 2017
Even so, people who struggle with not loving themselves can sometimes find love, and even experience a healthy relationship as healing. You may find that a loving partner leads you to view yourself more positively. Their acceptance, warmth, and caring can help to heal the inner pain and sense of brokenness that prevents you from feeling worthy – but you need to be able to take in their love for that to happen.
If you have found someone who truly appreciates and cares about you (whether friend or lover), consciously practice taking in these feelings even as you have doubts. Just as when you go to the movies, allow for the suspension of disbelief. And be open to the experience, despite it being unfamiliar or uncomfortable. Note how the person is being honest in their response to you – assuming this is the case. Then, despite your doubts, allow yourself to feel loved, not just for who you appear to be, but for who you really are. You might also notice an inner sense of warmth as you do this.
The experience of feeling loved may be fleeting, but that is all you need at first. Once you have it, choose to revisit it. The more you practice, the more easily it will probably come. This can lead you to valuing and loving yourself more, which will also help you to more fully love someone else.
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